Don’t ever forget that you are never alone*

Lately I’ve been thinking a bit about the concept of situational friends. I don’t mean people that you hang out with in certain situations-work, church, sports, school, with a certain group of friends, etc. and don’t see outside of those situations, or people that you only discuss certain topics with-politics, or religion, perhaps.

Instead, I’m thinking of someone that may come into your life for a short period of time when you’re going through a struggle or crisis of some sort. That person, for whatever reason, is the right one to help you make it through the crisis. After the crisis, you two go your separate ways. It’s a bit awkward to separate from someone that you’ve become emotionally close to-something like a breakup.

For me, it’s a bit difficult to lose touch with those who were important in my life. Often, I keep calling old college friends, playing phone tag, until I feel the relationship slipping away in a haze of different lives, children on their end, etc. I think I need to accept that someone can be extremely important in one phase of your life-but then not have a part to play afterwards. Of course, the same can go for you-you can counsel someone through a difficult situation, and then once they’re out of it, they may not want/need you around as a reminder anymore. You can make an impact on someone, love them, and let them go.

And that’s perfectly alright. Knowing when to leave the stage is often one of the most important parts of a performance.

*this blog may get a tad more personal. hope nobody minds. the current debt ceiling debate is too depressing (on all sides, but mostly on the house GOP) for me to want to write about public policy for a bit.

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About irreparabiletempus

God have mercy on me, a sinner.
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One Response to Don’t ever forget that you are never alone*

  1. David says:

    I don’t think (or I don’t want to accept) that amount of contact determines quality of relationship. It’s a relevant factor. But, it’s less important as we get older. At first, I thought it was law school/law firm that’s to blame, but now I think it’s the simple fact that having any full-time job (other than debate, where you get to see friends around the country regularly as part of your job) means we’re spending more time working in isolation instead of hanging out. Most people also get more independent as they get older, especially when in a relationship. It means each reunion is more meaningful even with less time or less goings on. There’s a history to relationships that gets created in initial stages, but it’s not the creation that’s the only or primarily meaningful aspect of relationships over time. I hope.

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